What Is Marital Mediation?
Marital mediation is a relatively new entry to the mediation field of mediation. In a sense it is neither “fish nor fowl.” It should be noted that marital mediation is not any kind of therapy. Known for its focus on communication and problem-solving skills, mediation offers couples whose marriages are experiencing problems, a comparatively short-term “fix.” Mediation is intended to focus on the immediate present to address problems expressed by the married couple that they, the participants, believe are damaging their relationship.
Led by a skilled and neutral facilitator, mediation offers a brainstorming approach for the couple to consider ways to restore their relationship or perhaps ways to build a new and better union. This may be achieved with the creation of a post-nuptial agreement. There should not be any presumption that the mediator will help the couple to uncover the underlying source or sources of tensions within their relationship.
Therapy seeks to uncover and address root causes of dysfunction. Marital mediation is a surface kind of process. It deals with the couple’s reporting of issues, behaviors, beliefs and the like, that they, as marital partners, perceive as causes of their marital problems.
The mediator, as the facilitator of the problem-solving process, strives to engage the couples in exploring strategies designed to reconstruct their relationship built on a new platform.
That platform may include commitments to:
…and so grows the long list of conceivable concerns raised, and potential approaches to arriving at solutions.
In summary:
What Is the End Product of Martial Mediation?
The end product of marital mediation may be a written agreement, a kind of contract that the couple enters into specifying, in detail, the terms and even the contingencies relating to their new “deal” for change. The contract may include returns to mediation for assessment of their progress or other forms of analysis of success.
Can Marital Mediation Produce a Legally Binding Agreement?
In some marital mediations, the contract may take the shape of a post-nuptial agreement. Here the couple states, in writing, the actual terms which will govern each party in the event of a future divorce. The parties must provide full financial disclosure of his and her present and even anticipated assets/liabilities. Each party also has the opportunity to secure independent legal counsel in order to be advised of individual legal rights as well as for an assessment as to whether the terms are fair and reasonable in light of existing law.
A post-nuptial contract settling “all rights and obligations arising from a marital relationship,” received the blessing of the Supreme Judicial Court of Massachusetts in August 2010, and, as such, offers an option for couples wishing to stayed married, but concerned about what will happen in the event of divorce. This is a kind of double-edged approach to the mediation equation. Here, the couple seeks to strengthen their marriage, but also to take the sting out of the uncertainty of a divorce action, by taking a proactive approach. Is this the right strategy for all couples? Of course, it is not. It is critical that the couple explore with the mediator the fit of a post-nuptial contract for them as a couple.
